


Welcome To The Archive California

by Linuviael



Category: AO3 Tags, Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Hotel California - The Eagles (Song), Supernatural
Genre: Classic Rock, Dean Plays Guitar, Everybody Loves Frank, Ew Not That Way, Gen, Goats Need Love Too, Hotel California - Freeform, Let us not go to Crackalot; Tis a silly place, Meta, Metafiction, Song Parody, Songfic, There is a line, Thinly Veiled Livejournal Reference, and I crossed it several hours ago, ao3 - Freeform, it's 2am, the eagles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 09:32:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5622388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Linuviael/pseuds/Linuviael
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A silly little song parody my brain devised in the wee hours while working on some longer things.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Welcome To The Archive California

**Author's Note:**

  * For [OrlesianTruffles](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OrlesianTruffles/gifts).



> Inspired by a snippet of conversation Truffles & I had earlier. I took it and ran. Forgive me, Readers, for I have sinned.

In a dark upstairs bedroom, Cool Ranch (TM) on my hands  
Warm smell of taquitos, screen lit without Comic Sans  
Up ahead in the browser, I saw a shimmering blink  
My breath grew heavy and my morale grew dim  
I had to click on that link  
No one stood in the doorway;  
I saw where submissions dwell  
And I was thinking to myself,  
" _This could be Rich-Text or this could be HTML_ "  
Then I lifted my finger and I scrolled down the way  
There were voices down the corridor  
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the Archive California  
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)  
Such a lovely space  
Plenty of fics at the Archive California  
Any kind of queer (Any kind of cheer)  
You can find it here

Our ships are vividly twisted, we pair the Impala with men  
We got a lot of pretty, pretty boys we call just 'friends'  
How they flirt in the graveyard, backseat tête-à-tête  
Some write to remember, some read to forget

So I called up the Admin,  
" _Please give me my command line_ "  
He said, " _We haven't had that feature here since nineteen ninety nine_ "  
And still those kudos are calling from far away,  
Wake you up in the middle of the night  
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the Archive California  
Such a lovely place (Such a lovely place)  
Such a lovely space  
Shippin' it up at the Archive California  
What a nice demise (What a nice demise)  
Hey, is that sunrise?

Mirrors of Erised on the ceiling,  
Firewhiskey on ice  
And she said " _Hi my name is Ebony Dark’ness Dementia Raven Way-_ "  
And in the Slytherin's chambers,  
They rather'd call a priest  
She put her goffik middle fingers up,  
But she still just looked deceased

Last thing I remember, I was  
reading <Umbridge/Centaurs>  
I had to find the button back  
To the page I was before  
" _Perhaps_ ," said the Admin,  
" _We are programmed to aggrieve..._  
_You can log-out any time you like,_  
_But you can never leave!_ "

***Commence massive Winchester leg-guitar interlude***

 


End file.
